Thursday 13 January 2011

Barack Courts Les Frogs

Sorry, I hope I haven't offended anyone by refering to the French as 'Les Frogs'. It's purely a term of endearment, a friendly chuck on the arm to our horse-eating friends on the other side of the Channel, whom I for one cannot bear to be in the presence of.

I'm not sure if it's something about Thierry Henry's arrogance, the fact that I can't afford a wax jacket with courderoy collar or perhaps simply because I was once told to 'eff off' (or words to that effect) by a French girl whilst holidaying in Le Touquet, that I now don't have much time for any of them.

President Bazza does however.

The other day my dad told me that his sister told him (in a sort of 'he said, she said...' way) that there was a newspaper article claiming France to be America's new 'Best Friend'.

I attempted to verify this by typing 'Obama France Best Friends' into Google yet this simply came up with lots of links to a website called 'Stormfront' that I think has something to do with the Met Office? - As narrated by lots of angry white men who don't seem to like foreigners.

and then I found it on a different website, the quote was there in black and white and with a clenched fist I read:

'We don’t have a stronger friend and stronger ally than Nicolas Sarkozy, and the French people.'

What the? Such a duplicitous so and so, why I oughtta....I thought it was us, good old Blighty that had the 'Special Relationship' with America..... And now I find that they're rushing around behind our backs, smooching up to our slutty neighbour and all the while I've been breaking my pert buttocks trying to get this flag signed by 100 British celebrities purely for President Obama's pleasure and for him to be able to read 100 messages of goodwill over a bowl of Alpen in the Oval Office!

All I can say is that when I meet up with Linford Christie in the next few weeks and he asks me what he should sign on the flag for Barack's attention, I might suggest a few choice words of my own!